Saturday, 1 January 2011

Beyond the Picket Fence

Haiku for him
My brother in heart
How quickly the tide turned
I mourn for that time

My lover in heart
I could cry you a river
I wish you the best

Everyone has the ability to be multi-faceted. Of this I am quite convinced. However you wish to develop those facets is your journey, that’s the journey that you will look back on and call life.

For as many people there are in the world today, there are personalities and facets to accommodate them. It is rare that any two would ever be identical but empathy and understanding are a common place between people. Like a cut diamond, you can turn a person, and absorb them, the colours, the sparkle the many faces, like masks they cover the facet of a person and give it a personality.

Relationships are evolving.
I don’t need to meet you to understand you.

I saw your photographs and read your emails. I understood your character and through a process of questions, answers, information exchange and processing, I formed a judgement. I found your circle of friends, your family, you opened a window to your world and I stood in your garden and observed.

There are problems that surface when looking into a life and they are exactly the same as when looking into a home. You know who lives there, you know their routine. What you don’t know is what is said when the doors are locked and the windows are closed.
Like pieces of a jigsaw I filled in the blanks.
In my mind you were happy behind your picket fence and immaculate drapes……how shocking when the true fa├žade was revealed.

Information exchange is a powerful catalyst. The more you gave the more I assimilated, the more your emails stacked in my inbox, the faster I responded and the more I said…and the less reserved you became and I wanted to know, more had to know.

The diamond turned and in a flash the mask slipped. You saw my true colours, red-hot, wanton, unrestrained….you recognised me for who I was and unwittingly I had dropped all my cards straight into your lap. It had been a long time since you had seen me, and you wanted to see more- you were hungry. For a moment, our worlds touched and the connection was made.

I tried my best to remain above board, socially acceptable and proper in an attempt to twist the mask back to the time when I was standing in your garden looking in, but sadly this just increased your desire and want- ironically the harder I tried, the more it worked against me.
You wanted the Bad Girl, and she wanted you, we had come too far to ignore what we both knew. You could twist the mask with a flutter of words and my mind was transported. I could not longer stay a spectator in the garden.

We knew I couldn’t come into the house, and you couldn’t come outside, beyond the picket fence- not until the time is right for you. And that is why I had to leave.

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